


nowhere left to run

by thecuddlechesters



Category: Pacific Rim (2013), The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pacific Rim Fusion, Canonical Character Death, Cheating, Childhood Memories, Flashbacks, Made Up Jaeger names, Multi, Non-Canonical Character Death, POV Multiple, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Recreational Drug Use
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-12
Updated: 2015-07-24
Packaged: 2018-04-04 01:07:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4120758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecuddlechesters/pseuds/thecuddlechesters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Kaiju are getting stronger; the Jaeger program, weaker. With limited pilots and cut funding, the last Shatterdome in San Francisco is working toward finally ending the apocalypse. And they'll stop at nothing to save the world or die trying.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. this is how i disappear

**Author's Note:**

> Tags will be added as the story progresses.
> 
> Un-beta'd, so all mistakes are mine.
> 
> Chapter title taken from My Chemical Romance song.

_2016_

 

Clarke only ever wanted to fight.

She fought with the boys on the playground when they pulled her pigtails. (She broke one's nose, and Wells went on to become her best friend.)

She fought with her mother about how she was no longer a child, and how she should treated as such.

She fought with her father when he told her he was leaving to help with the Jaeger program.

Fighting was what she knew. It's what she was good at.

So when a recruitment center popped up in her home town, she packed a bag. All she left for her mother was a simple note: _I'm doing what he would want me to do._

She called Wells on the way there, and only minutes later he was walking alongside her.

“Wells, what the hell-”

He cut her off. “Where you go, I go. Besides, who else are you gonna Drift with?”

 

* * *

 

They were both assigned to the San Francisco Shatterdome, the same as her father had been.

 

* * *

 

She and Wells weren't Drift compatible. They had both chased the rabbit, not managing to stay in alignment. Clarke had latched onto the day her father had left, screaming that he wasn't allowed to leave her, then when Marcus Kane, Jake Griffin's co-pilot, came to tell her and her mother that Jake had been killed during a fight with a Kaiju. Wells got stuck in the last memory he had of his mother, eyes catching on the gauntness of her face and the slimness of her fingers. He cried silently as he saw her life slipping away.

When they stepped out of the Jaeger, they grabbed each other, sinking down together. The simple contact helped them both to calm their minds and Clarke gave Wells a weak smile. “We'll get it next time.”

 

* * *

 

There wasn't a next time. Wells had managed to Drift with a girl named Fox, from across the country. Wells had immediately liked her, and when they fought, Clarke looked on with jealousy as she saw the connection being made. Wells bounded up to her after, and she schooled her face into an expression of happiness, feeling slightly guilty for the betrayal she felt.

 

* * *

 

Clarke attempted many more times to Drift. Lexa, Anya, Indra, the list went on. Soon after she (attempted) to Drift with someone, they seemed to find their match. Anya and Indra Drifted seamlessly, Lexa Drifting with a hulk of a guy, Lincoln. Seeing them side by side would be hysterical if not for her constant frustration.

 

* * *

 

_2017_

 

Months after she had given up on Drifting with anyone, someone found her in one of her many hiding spaces. Curled up on a forgotten catwalk in the Jaeger bay, she startled when footsteps sounded behind her.

“I thought I might find you here.”

As the guy sat down, Clarke stared. “Why were you looking for me?”

He gave her a sweet smile, and Clarke couldn't help the blush that crept up her neck. “I'm looking for a new co-pilot. I thought you might be interested.

Clarke shook her head. “I'm not really compatible with anyone. I've tried loads of times. Too many times.”

“I think you'd be able to Drift with me,” he said, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

“I don't even know your name,” she muttered, suddenly shy.

He gave her another smile, this one blinding. “I'm Finn.”

 

* * *

 

She and Finn weren't compatible. She had wiped the floor with him in sparring. It came as no surprise to Clarke, and Finn seemed okay with it. If Clark was paying attention, she would have seen that he was a little bit relieved.

While they weren't _Drift_ compatible, they were still good with one another. Finn finally made Clarke feel wanted. Since Wells had Drifted with Fox, he spent more time with her and their new Jaeger, Dragon Fire. Wells still spoke to her, but only in the mess hall, where they saw each other for meals. She couldn't really blame him, but at the same time she felt rejected. Finn helped that feeling to disappear.

And she was starting to fall in love with him.

 

* * *

 

Clarke had finally given up on piloting a Jaeger. She wasn't compatible with anyone, and so she went to work in medical. She was a week into her internship when Marshal Kane strode through the doors into the med-bay.

“Miss Griffin.”

She saluted. “Marshal Kane. What can I do for you, sir?”

“Are you still interested in piloting a Jaeger?”

Clarke froze. “Yes- yes, sir.”

“Tomorrow, 0600, the sparring room. We may have found you a co-pilot.” With that, he turned and walked away, leaving Clarke gaping after him.

 

* * *

 

Clarke couldn't sleep. It was only midnight, and she had six hours until she could meet her possible co-pilot. She had to stop herself from getting too excited, however, fearing her track record was about to get another failure listed. At around two, she fell into a fitful sleep, and dreamed of her perfect Jaeger.

When she woke up around five-thirty, she gave up on the idea of more sleep. Dressing in loose yoga pants and a tank top, she slipped out of her bunk and down to the sparring room. Surprisingly, she wasn't the only one.

A dark-haired, dark-skinned girl was on the mat, twirling her staff and practicing intricate exercises. Clarke considered going back to her room, but the girl heard her enter and turned around.

“Hi!” she exclaimed, walking over. “Are you Clarke?”

She nodded.

The girl bounced up and down on the balls of her feet. “I'm Raven, Raven Reyes. I'm supposed to be your co-pilot.”

Clarke couldn't hold back a smile. “I hope we're compatible. Most people I've tried to Drift with, it didn't exactly work out.”

The girl – Raven – nodded sympathetically. “I get it. The people I've Drifted with were never quite right. Even my boyfriend. Which is surprising, since I grew up with him. We had pretty much all the same memories.”

“Same with me actually. I tried to Drift with my boyfriend, but we didn't even manage to fight together. I kicked his ass.” Raven let out a snort. “He took it with good grace, though.”

“My boyfriend is actually at this 'dome. I transferred here a few days ago so I could be with him. I haven't seen him yet, but I really want to surprise him.”

They continued their easy conversation, and they were discussing their dream Jaeger when the Marshal walked in. When he cleared his throat, they both straightened up, taking a stiff stance.

“Ranger Reyes, Ranger Griffin, at ease. No one else will be present for your sparring. I will be keeping score. First to four wins. Proceed.”

Glancing at each other, they nodded. Clarke went through some warm-up stretches while Raven grabbed her a staff from the wall. As Clarke twirled her staff around her, Raven went through some stretches of her own. Finally, they were both prepared.

They stood across from one another on the mat, Clarke holding her staff parallel to her body, Raven holding hers with a careless abandon, pointed towards the ground. They stared at one another, each waiting for the other to make the first move. Raven broke first, charging towards Clarke and swinging the staff toward her feet. Clarke jumped and as Raven corrected herself, she tapped her shoulder.

“One-zero.”

Raven grinned, readjusting her stance. Again, she charged first. She feinted towards Clarke's feet, and when she went to jump, brought it up and tapped Clarke's ribs.

“One-one.”

The fight continued, the marshal calling out the points. They were ducking and rolling, each making point after point, but they soon tuned out the marshal and concentrated on each other. Clarke could almost feel Raven's mind, anticipating where she was going to move and where she was going to make a shot. It was the same for Raven. Finally, the marshal called out for them to stop.

They both collapsed to the mat, breathing hard and grinning widely. Their staffs lay abandoned to the side, and the marshal could barely contain his sigh. “Meet in the Jaeger bay at 1800 hours to test the handshake.”

Raven and Clarke shared an ecstatic smile, and ignoring the fact that they were both sweaty and exhausted, hugged and shrieked and bounced around the mat.

“We did it!” Raven crowed.

 

* * *

 

At exactly 6 o'clock, Raven and Clarke stepped into the Jaeger bay. A technician ushered them into the Conn-Pod of the newest Jaeger. Clarke stared.

“This is gonna be our Jaeger?” Raven whispered to her. Clarke nodded mutely. Moments later, the intercom crackled.

“Mr. Miller, Mr. Wick, please strap the rangers into their harnesses.” An unfamiliar voice continued giving orders, and various technicians puttered around the Conn-Pod. Clarke was attended to by a dark-skinned man in a beanie, who gave her a small smile and didn't speak. Raven got the scruffy guy with a few days beard-growth and hair that looked like it hadn't been brushed in a week. He was clearly trying to flirt with her, but she just smiled and shook her head.

When they were fully strapped in, the unfamiliar voice came back. “Is everyone comfortable?” Clarke and Raven glanced at each other, the yellow lights from the helmets giving them an unearthly glow.

Clarke reached up and pressed the radio button. “Yes, sir. Locked and loaded.”

Raven snorted. “Dude, that was so lame.”

“Like you could have done better.”

The smile Raven gave her only confirmed that thought.

The voice came back. “Okay, you guys, we're gonna start in just a few moments.”

Raven looked over at Clarke. “Who the hell is that?”

“I'm Nyko.” A soft laugh followed, and Raven jumped. _Oh_ , she mouthed. Clarke let out a snicker.

“Okay, everyone. Initiating neural handshake in three.... two... one....”

And Clarke was gone.

 

_Jake, swinging her around, putting her up on his shoulders._

_Her mom, taking away the new necklace that Finn had given her to try and sell it._

_Abby, taking away her art supplies, yelling that her daughter was going into medical school, not wasting her life doing glorified finger paintings._

_Her mother, dead on the floor from a heroin overdose._

_Her dad, being lowered into the ground, Marcus standing off to the side, Abby gripping her hand too tightly._

_Finn, holding her hand at their eighth grade dance, planting a chaste kiss on her lips._

_Finn, asking if she wanted to be his co-pilot._

_Finn, moving away from the Anchorage Shatterdome, drawing her into his bed to say good-bye with his body._

_Finn, pressing her against the wall of her bunk, whispering her name into her skin. “Clarke, Clarke, Clarke, so beautiful, you're so beautiful.”_

 

_Finn._

 

_Finn._

 

_Finn._

 

_That motherfucker._

 

With a jolt, they came back to the present. No longer was it Clarke and Raven, but ClarkeandRaven, one being, one mind.

“Handshake strong and holding. Left brain, calibrated. Right brain, calibrated.”

“Congratulations, you two,” the marshal's voice sounded over the intercom. “You've just successfully Drifted.”

 

* * *

 

They did as they were instructed, practicing arm movements. A feeling of euphoria filled them both, only slightly marred by what they had seen in the Drift.

When the marshal and the two main brains of K-Science were satisfied, they broke the connection, unstrapping them from the harnesses and telling them to go eat something. Clarke was ravenous, and she knew Raven was too.

Raven walked beside her silently, staring straight ahead. Finally, Clarke couldn't take it anymore.

“I- I would understand if you didn't want to pilot with me.”

Raven's head shot around so fast Clarke was surprised she didn't get whiplash. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“With... with Finn. I would get it if you didn't-” Raven cut her off.

“You are the first and only person I've successfully Drifted with. You _are_ my co-pilot. We are going to take that Jaeger, and we are going to kick some Kaiju ass. But first, I'm gonna go eat my weight in steak and mashed potatoes, and then I'm going to find Finn Collins and beat the shit out of him.”

She started forward again, leaving Clarke to scurry after her. “So you're not angry? That we- that me and him-”

“You didn't know about me. I saw that in the Drift. I'm angry at him, for lying to me in all the letters he sent me and all the video chats we had. I'm angry at the fact that he just abandoned me, after all we had been though together. I'm angry at circumstances, Clarke, not you.”

Clarke sighed with relief. Raven smirked. “Don't cry on me, Griffin. Come on, we're gonna need our strength to go break all of Finn's limbs.”

 _Not_ that _much strength_ , Clarke thought to herself. To her surprise, Raven burst out laughing. “That's true. We both beat his ass in sparring.”

 


	2. help, i'm alive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Un'-beta'd.
> 
> Chapter title taken from song by Metric.
> 
> Sorry I took so long to update, I've spent the last like, week and a half going through the Raleigh Becket/Chuck Hansen tag on here because those assholes ruined my life.

_2014_

 

Bellamy was raised with four words etched in his brain.

_Your sister, your responsibility._

Bellamy lived by those words. Octavia was number one. And when Octavia decided that she was going to be a Jaeger pilot, Bellamy didn't try to dissuade her. (He knew he would never manage it.) Instead, he packed his bag along with her. When they reached the nearest Shatterdome, they didn't even try to turn them away. One look at Octavia and they were practically begging her to be a pilot.

When they told her a few months later that she would meet a group of cadets to try and find her a co-pilot, she didn't even let them finish their sentence. “Bellamy is my co-pilot. No contest.”

And that's how the Blakes became Jaeger pilots.

 

* * *

 

_2015_

 

It was a standard run. About a year and a half after they had gotten their Jaeger, they deployed Chiron's Pride as back-up for Gipsy Danger against the Kaiju Hammerhead. When Gipsy got tossed aside and was left broken on the shores of L.A., they started forward. After making radio contact with the Becket brothers, confirming that they were still alive, they took up the fight. It seemed almost too easy, the Kaiju leaving too many openings. When it sank underneath the waves, Bellamy and Octavia gave themselves a high-five, the Jaeger following the motion. From the shore it probably looked ridiculous, but to the Blakes, it was tradition.

They were starting to turn back, when the comm crackled to life again. “That Kaiju's not dead, we're still getting vitals, _turn around, that Kaiju_ -”

LOCCENT was cut off as they were slammed from behind, making the screens in the Conn-Pod flicker. Octavia, situated on the right, fired up the elbow rocked and let it fly, landing a punch on Hammerhead's jaw. When the Kaiju ripped off the right arm, she screamed. Bellamy let out a bellow at the sound, yelling to fire up the plasma cannon. Before it was fully charged, the Kaiju dug his claws into the Conn-Pod, sending shrapnel flying. Some hit Octavia, and Bellamy could feel the waves of her pain through the Drift.

Then she was gone.

She was still there, physically. Bellamy could see her slumped in the harness. But she was no longer in his brain, no longer a constant presence in the back of his mind. He let out a scream that sounded vaguely like her name.

Finally, the cannon was charged, and he shot, over and over, emptying the clip into the Kaiju's chest. When it sank under the waves for a second time, Bellamy stomped, making the giant metal robot hit the body again and again, leaving nothing but bits of Kaiju flesh and bone floating in the water, dyed a bright blue by the Kaiju blood.

Turning the Jaeger around took all of his strength. And as he stumbled back towards the shore, he prayed. For the first time in his life, he prayed. And the string of words coming out of his mouth consisted of a few curses, a few _ohgodplease_ 's, and her name. Her name, _OctaviaOctaviaOctaviaOctaviaOctavia,_ again and again and again. And his mantra.

_Your sister, your responsibility._

 

* * *

 

When he got back to the shore, he collapsed inside the Jaeger, still connected to the Jaeger itself. He narrowly missed landing on Gipsy Danger. When Chiron's Pride was prone on the ground, he undid himself from his harness, and climbed over broken equipment and shards of metal to Octavia. The harness wouldn't disconnect from the drivesuit, and with a scream, he wrenched he metal away. Cradling his sister's body, he scrambled, checking for a pulse. His gloves got in the way, and he yanked them off, tossing them aside. He continued his search, and when the engineers finally managed to cut their way into the Conn-Pod, they found Bellamy curled around his sister's body, refusing to let anyone else near her.

Eventually, someone had the idea to tranq him, and when they pricked the needle into his neck, he didn't fight, just continued to murmur her name.

 

* * *

  

Bellamy woke in the infirmary, bandaged and broken. He had three fractured ribs, a sprained ankle, broken wrist, and circuitry burns all along his right arm. When the nurses came to check on him, he tried to refuse their treatment. But his body betrayed him, and they replaced his IV bag and reapplied his bandages with only weak efforts on his part to stop them.

His only question was “Where's Octavia?”

The nurses ignored him and gave him another shot, and morphine slowly trickled through his bloodstream. His dreams were filled with silence and blood, and Octavia's face looking as though he had killed her himself. Which, he guessed, was indeed the case.

 

* * *

 

When he woke up again, someone he had no interest in seeing was sitting in the chair beside his bed. Raleigh Becket and he had never had any animosity between them, but that was before his screw up had gotten his sister hurt. Because she was only hurt, not dead. She couldn't be dead. A girl with that much fire in her didn't die like that. She went down screaming, killing a Kaiju with her final breath. Not impaled with some shrapnel.

“What do you want, Becket?”

Raleigh looked up at the sound of his voice, and his eyes were filled with pity. He stood, walking around to stand at the end of his bed. “Bellamy... I- I'm sorry. I wish I didn't have to tell you this, but... your sister...” His voice cracked. “She didn't make it.”

Bellamy shook his head. “Don't lie. Octavia- O would never leave me.”

Raleigh's fists tightened, knuckles white. “Bellamy-” He cut him off.

“My sister isn't dead.”

Without a word, Raleigh turned and walked away. And try as he might, Bellamy couldn't get back to sleep again.

 

* * *

 

_Three years later – 2018_

 

Bellamy woke with a muffled scream, and the man in the bed beside him shushed him. Shaking and covered with a thin film of sweat, he sat up and tossed his blankets aside. Wearing nothing but sweat pants and a gray t-shirt, he shuffled down the aisle of beds, ignoring the whispers of the men around him. It was only half-past three in the morning, and his nightmare had woken the others. Again.

He had been working on the coastal wall for only a few months, and it was at least twice a week that a nightmare woke not only him but the other workers as well. His nightmares were a regular occurrence, but occasionally he managed to keep it under control. If he had his way, he would be living in the woods, far from Kaiju and people alike. But he needed food and he had no idea how to hunt. So he worked on the wall, dealt with his shit in anyway possible, and lived off of two meager meals a day.

This dream had been no different from any other. He was in his Jaeger, watching his sister die over and over and over again. He couldn't stop it or change fate, he could only watch as his reason for living slipped away.

Outside of the barracks, he slipped around the back and used the rusted ladder there to crawl up to the top of the building. Since the shortage of food, other shortages had affected them as well. Electricity was cut off by eleven, and started again at seven in the morning. Meaning that after a long day working and then a terrible nightmare, Bellamy could climb up to his favorite spot and see the stars in all their glory.

Star-gazing had been a favorite hobby of Octavia's. She could name almost every constellation in the sky. She had tried teaching them to Bellamy, but he was hopeless at memorization. Instead he was just content to hear her ramble on about the stars and the stories behind them. He had taught her most of the stories, having read them growing up. But he let her feel as though she was re-teaching them. And she was happy.

But then the Kaiju had killed her, and he was alone.

 

* * *

 

The next day, when Bellamy was on break, he was trying to concentrate on a book about Greek myths. His concentration was broken when a chopper cut though the air, landing on the helipad that had hastily been put down a few months back when one of the higher-ups who had demanded the wall be built had come to visit. He ignored the people stepping out and went back to his book.

“Ranger Blake?”

His spine stiffened and his book dropped from his hands. He turned slowly to see a man, dark hair whipping in the wind.

“I think you've got the wrong guy,” he muttered, moving to collect his things.

“Ranger Bellamy William Blake, pilot of the Jaeger Chiron's Pride, sister Octavia Christine Blake killed in action against the Kaiju Hammerhead. I know exactly who you are, Ranger Blake.”

Bellamy whirled around. “I'm not a ranger anymore,” he said evenly, only just managing to reign in a punch.

“Once a ranger, always a ranger.”

“I'm retired.”

The stranger had the nerve to laugh. “Retirement only comes after filing the proper paperwork. Did you fill out that paperwork before you ran away in the dead of the night a week after your sister's death? Before you missed the funeral?”

Bellamy's breath caught in his throat. “Funeral?”

The man nodded. “She was buried in the cemetery at the San Francisco Shatterdome. She was hailed as a hero, for dying in combat against a Category 3 Kaiju. ”

Bellamy felt his lips twist, and with a jolt realized he was smiling. Of course Octavia would be hailed as a hero. She had been the hero in their Jaeger, Bellamy simply her side-kick. He had never resented her for that. He had even encouraged it. Shaking himself, he turned back to he stranger.

“What do you want from me?”

“I want you to help save the world.”

 

* * *

 

The stranger introduced himself as Marshal Marcus Kane. Bellamy couldn't find it in him to care. He packed his bag and boarded the chopper, ignoring the glances of the men he had worked with for months. The ride to San Francisco was silent save for the muttered conversation between Kane and the pilot.

When they reached the San Francisco Shatterdome, they were greeted by a rag-tag pair, one tall and gangly, the other short and reserved. They introduced themselves as Dr. Jasper Jordan and Dr. Monty Green, respectively. Dr. Jordan (“Please, call me Jasper, I insist”) was falling all over himself trying to talk to him. His quieter counterpart, Dr. Green, gave Bellamy a small smile and whispered, “Just ignore him.”

The Marshal's tablet beeped, and he grabbed a random technician to show Bellamy around the Jaeger bay. The Marshal bid Bellamy good-bye, promising to find him later to discuss 'the plan'.

The technician (“I'm an _engineer_ , goddammit”) introduced himself as Kyle Wick.

“I don't know where your room is, but I can show you the new Jaeger. It doesn't have any pilots yet. It'll probably be yours.”

“What happened to Chiron's Pride?”

Kyle glanced back at him. “That was sent to Oblivion Bay. There was too much damage to the internal gears and weaponry to repair it. The new one is different, but it's good.”

The news that his Jaeger was gone hit him like a brick. Kyle didn't seem to notice. “This new one's just waiting for her pilots.”

As Kyle punched in the code and the bay doors swung open, Bellamy froze in shock. She was beautiful. All gleaming metal and pointed edges. People scurried around the catwalks, trying to put her together.

“It's not done yet?”

Kyle winced. “Funding's gone down since you were last here, so it takes longer to get parts. Jaeger pilots used to be thought of as saviors. Now that 'Wall of Life' is the new thing. Like that piece of shit is gonna save anyone.”

Bellamy felt the same. He'd thought the same since the beginning. But he had to do something for food.

Kyle spoke up again. “If you want, I can call someone to bring you to your room.”

Bellamy shook his head. “I'll find it.” Without another word, he walked away. Shatterdome's all had the same basic layout, and he could find the barracks from the Jaeger bay.

 

* * *

 

When he reached the barracks, he stopped. Regardless of knowing how to get there, he had no idea which room was his. At that moment, a girl stepped out of her room, and he cleared his throat. She jumped and let out a small yelp. He smirked, and she rolled her eyes.

“What do you want?”

“I was wondering if you knew where an empty bunk was.”

She cast her eyes down the hall. “Take your pick. There aren't too many Jaeger pilots anymore – there's not really much need for rooms.” With that, she locked the door behind her and sidled past him.

“Welcome to the last Shatterdome.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god please please please please don't hate me. I love Octavia to death but I'm kind of trying to mirror Bellamy to Raleigh a little bit, while also keeping my own ideas mixed in. And I'm so sorry. There will probably be a few more mentions of the Becket brothers because I love them and I think Yancy should have lived even though that kind of would have made the whole movie moot.


	3. the weight of living pt. 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Un-beta'd.
> 
> Chapter title taken from Bastille song of the same name.
> 
> Again, super sorry this is so late, and short and shitty. I had a lot going on last week but this week there was really no good excuse because I've been watching Lost all the time. 
> 
> Let me know if you see any errors (this was mostly typed on my tablet) and let me know if you think this was exceptionally shitty (kidding I know it is, pls don't remind me).
> 
> Also: again, it might be a week or two til I can update, because school is starting in a week, and I have band after school, and in general I'll be pretty busy, but I will update as soon as possible.

When Clarke heard that Bellamy Blake was in the Shatterdome, she was torn between displeasure and admiration. She knew everything that had happened to him on his last run: losing his sister, killing a Kaiju single-handedly, and getting Chiron's Pride back to shore on his own. That was what Clarke admired. But hearing how he had disappeared off the face of the planet a week later, that was when she got pissed off. She knew it was hard to lose a family member to the cause. And while she hadn't experienced it herself, it must have been worse to be Drifting with his sister when she died. But leaving? Abandoning the program, endangering millions of lives? Clarke couldn't get past that.

“Bellamy Blake. Here.” Raven kept repeating herself. Clarke slowly started to get annoyed.

Wick nodded. “I showed him the new Jaeger and everything. The new one's probably gonna be his.”

Clarke whistled. “Lucky bastard.” “Hey,” Raven whined. “Sky Princess is pretty bad-ass, if I do say so myself.”

“Okay, one, you're only saying that because you helped with repairs and inevitably changed something to make it 'better', and two, I'm not saying that she isn't. She's just... outdated.” Clarke ignored Raven's look of incredulity and went back to her book.

“Princess is pretty good,” Wick agreed.

“Pretty good? _Pretty good_? Mashed potatoes are _pretty good._ Indoor plumbing is _pretty good_. Your skills in bed are _pretty good_. Sky Princess is fucking _amazing_.” Wick tried to defend his skills in bed but Raven continued. “Complaining about Sky Princess, or not giving her the respect she deserves, is punishable by death.”

“Don't be over-dramatic, Rae,” Clarke muttered, turning a page. Raven snatched the book from her hands and tossed it to the other side of the room. With a sigh, Clarke reached over to her bedside table and grabbed another book, much to Raven's chagrin.

“You guys suck, I'm gonna go find Jasper and watch him try to flirt with that cute techie Maya.” A few minutes after Raven left, Wick followed suit, giving Clarke a small pat on her hand to say good-bye. After they were both gone, Clarke tossed her book down and rolled onto her back. She tried to stop herself, but all she could think of was Bellamy Blake.

* * *

 “I heard that he's a cocky asshole.”

This was muttered in Clarke's direction by Fox at dinner that night, the brunette seated across from her. “He sure acts like one, anyways.”

“You've talked to him?” Wells asked, jealousy poorly concealed on his face.

“He asked if there were any free rooms, but he was smirking like he knew something I didn't. It was... weird.” Clarke rolled her eyes.

“If he seems like a cocky asshole, then he's probably a cocky asshole.”

“Speak of the devil,” Raven whispered in Clarke's ear. She glanced up to see the infamous Bellamy Blake step hesitantly off the stairs, tray in hand. For reasons Clarke couldn't fathom, Raven stood and waved him over. He took a moment to notice her, and Clarke couldn't help the brief trickle of jealousy when she saw him admire Raven. That he was checking her out wasn't the problem. It was just that Raven's looks drew people in, but her fire and intelligence kept the people in place. Clarke ofter scared away any potential suitors by accidentally insulting them too much.

When Blake reached the table, Clarke kept her head down, concentrating way too hard on her macaroni and cheese. When he greeted the table, she nearly missed it. His voice was so quiet, subdued. It almost made her pity him. Almost. Instead, she took a bite of her mac and cheese, swallowed hard, and looked up.

Someone at the table was doing introductions, and he stared into Clarke's eyes while they introduced her as Princess. His eyes widened slightly at the nickname, but Clarke took it in stride. She reached over the table and shook his hand. “Clarke Griffin, one half of the Sky Princess Jaeger team. The other half-” she grabbed Raven's tank top and yanked her into the conversation, “-is Raven Reyes, who was nice enough to invite you over here but not enough to actually talk to you.”

Raven spluttered out an apology, glanced around, and scooted closer. “So... you really fought in solo combat?”

He froze, fork of mashed potatoes hovering half-way to his mouth. Slowly, he set his fork down. “Yes.” 

Raven waited. When he didn't say anything else, she prodded again. “What was it like?”

He stared at her. Raven squirmed in her seat, finally backing down after a minute had passed. Clarke elbowed her in the side. “Excuse her,” she said, causing his eyes to look toward her. “She's not really one for tact.” He gave a quick nod. “Obviously.”

Raven gaped, open-mouthed, at the two of them, then rolled back her shoulders and lifted her chin. “Like I need you guys.” Without another word, she turned and jumped in the conversation Wick was having with Lexa across the aisle. Something to do with the speed of Jaegers. Or something.

Clarke turned back to Blake. “So. How long's it been since you jockeyed last?”

His jaw tightened. “About three years. Give or take.”

Clarke nodded. When she didn't ask any more questions, he seemed to relax a bit. His shoulders loosened and he managed to eat half of his food before shit broke loose.

Over the din of the mess hall, Clarke almost missed it. but, unmistakably, Lexa was speaking. "I don't see what's so special about the guy, to be honest. I mean, he was a good point back in the day, but he bailed. Who does that?"

Wick spoke up in Bellamy's defense. "The guy lost his sister, Lexa, while in the Drift. That had to be hard on the guy."

"Yea, I can understand that. But he could've stayed. When Chiron's Pride went down, it was just a few months after that that the program went to shit. He should have stayed."

Clarke glanced at Bellamy. His eyes were shut tight and his breathing was uneven. Without thinking, she grabbed his hand. "Come with me."

When they stood, the table across the aisle got quiet. Clarke glared over at Lexa. She met her gaze for a moment, then looked down at her tray. Raven wouldn't meet Clarke's eyes at all, and that was what pushed Clarke over the edge. Sticking out her chin,she grabbed hold of Bellamy's hand and dragged him out of the mess hall.

* * *

 "I'm sorry about what just happened."

Blake shook his head. "Not really your fault. Why are you apologizing?"

"Those people are my friends. I thought that I knew them better."

They were in the Jaeger bay, perched on a catwalk high above the metal behemoths. When he didn't say anything, Clarke glanced over at him. He was staring pointedly away from her. Before she could open her mouth, he was talking. "What are you doing?"

Clarke raised her eyebrows. "Excuse me?"

"I mean, what are you doing with me? Why are you here?"

"If you want me to go..."

"I'm not asking you to leave, Jesus Christ. I just don't want your pity, or whatever this is."

Clarke rolled her eyes. "I know what it's like, okay? To have people talk shit about you when you're right there. I figured you wouldn't enjoy it. So here we are." Bellamy looked over at her and Clarke had to force back a shiver. _What the hell is wrong with me,_  she wondered to herself. His brown eyes seemed to sparkle as he looked at her, but when she looked back they seemed just as dead as when she had first seen him at the beginning of lunch.

For a while, they continued to sit, content in the silence. What he asked next broke the silence and a little bit of Clarke's heart.

"Do you know where the cemetery is?" She nodded slowly. Bellamy ducked his head bashfully.

"Could you show me?"


End file.
